As I was driving onto base the other day, the chaplain's message on the church board said "Life isn't about waiting for the storm to pass. It's about learning to dance in the rain."
Sometimes that is so hard to do. Life starts to feel like one event after another - like of I can just make it through this life will slow down again. And yet somehow it never does. Something else inevitably comes along and messes things up. Life's routine is by it's very definition not routine at all. I find myself waking up in the morning and sitting with a hot mug of tea and reminding myself to face each day with a positive attitude. Life could be SOOO much worse.
And, I have a beautiful home with three loving and healthy children, plenty to eat, and nice clothes to wear. I really have nothing worthy of complaint in my life, and yet I still do. I know that happiness is a decision you make. Just lately for some reason it seems harder to put that into practice. I need to make it my daily mantra and tattoo it on the back of my hand so I don't forget it!
It is now after midnight, and I'm sitting here babbling, so I'm off to bed. So that I can face Monday with a good attitude. OK, well, being realistic, I'll settle for just not a completely piss-poor one! Night!
Sunday, October 26, 2008
Sunday, October 12, 2008
Quote for the Day
"Tenderness and kindness are not signs of weakness and despair but manifestations of strength and resolution."
Kahlil Gibran
Kahlil Gibran
Getting Old...
Well, I obviously haven't been on here in awhile. I really don't have much excuse either except that life has taken over once again, and me-time has been pushed to the back burner. I am totally feeling it now, because my brain feels ready to explode from too much pent up, well, everything!
So, it has been a crazy month here. My daughter turned 9, and for one of her presents I finally agreed to let her pierce her ears. Up until now, when I asked her why she wanted them pierced, she would always answer because the others girls have theirs pierced. I thought that was kind of a stupid reason, so I told her no. After all, if she caves in to peer pressure now, what's going to happen later when something much bigger (i.e. drugs or sex) are on the line. So, when she said because she thought it looks pretty and that she was finally old enough, I had to agree. So, I took her the other day, and she was SO excited! She does look really cute, and I keep catching her looking at herself in the mirror. My issue is only that this was on my list of rites of passage as you get older...
To make me feel even older (as if that was not enough), my son just turned 11. Yup, 11! Most days I still feel too young to have an 11 year old. But, I digress. We were out shopping the other day, picking up Halloween Costumes, and he said he didn't want one. He said he was too old to get dressed up and go Trick or Treating! Too old! What does that make me? Ancient? You know, I am not much of a Halloween girl myself, but I found myself standing in the middle of Target almost pleading with him for just one more year. He just said no thanks...
So, here I sit, late at night, unable to sleep as my husband has stinky duty and is getting ready to deploy yet again, feeling a little old and quite frankly sorry for myself. So, I think I shall go make a cup of tea, take a nice hot bath, and melt my troubles away.
So, it has been a crazy month here. My daughter turned 9, and for one of her presents I finally agreed to let her pierce her ears. Up until now, when I asked her why she wanted them pierced, she would always answer because the others girls have theirs pierced. I thought that was kind of a stupid reason, so I told her no. After all, if she caves in to peer pressure now, what's going to happen later when something much bigger (i.e. drugs or sex) are on the line. So, when she said because she thought it looks pretty and that she was finally old enough, I had to agree. So, I took her the other day, and she was SO excited! She does look really cute, and I keep catching her looking at herself in the mirror. My issue is only that this was on my list of rites of passage as you get older...
To make me feel even older (as if that was not enough), my son just turned 11. Yup, 11! Most days I still feel too young to have an 11 year old. But, I digress. We were out shopping the other day, picking up Halloween Costumes, and he said he didn't want one. He said he was too old to get dressed up and go Trick or Treating! Too old! What does that make me? Ancient? You know, I am not much of a Halloween girl myself, but I found myself standing in the middle of Target almost pleading with him for just one more year. He just said no thanks...
So, here I sit, late at night, unable to sleep as my husband has stinky duty and is getting ready to deploy yet again, feeling a little old and quite frankly sorry for myself. So, I think I shall go make a cup of tea, take a nice hot bath, and melt my troubles away.
Friday, May 30, 2008
I'll Wait For You
You left me today
before the dawn
I watched you walk away
into the shadow
and the mist
regretting what was unsaid
knowing that you heard it anyway
I fear for you
and for me
that you won't
come home
that you'll leave me
alone
that I'll wait for you
on the pier
in the rain
and you won't come
the days stand still
when you're away
I lament you absence
and I await your return
before the dawn
I watched you walk away
into the shadow
and the mist
regretting what was unsaid
knowing that you heard it anyway
I fear for you
and for me
that you won't
come home
that you'll leave me
alone
that I'll wait for you
on the pier
in the rain
and you won't come
the days stand still
when you're away
I lament you absence
and I await your return
Thursday, April 24, 2008
Snowflake's Meme
Rules: - Pick your birth month.-
Bold the 5-10 that best apply to you.-
Copy to your own journal, with all twelve months.-
Tag 12 people from your friends list.
Click here to get the list of all twelve months.
NOVEMBER: Has a lot of ideas. Difficult to fathom. Thinks forward. Unique and brilliant. Extraordinary ideas. Sharp thinking. Fine and strong clairvoyance. Can become good doctors. Dynamic in personality. Secretive. Inquisitive. Knows how to dig secrets. Always thinking. Less talkative but amiable. Brave and generous. Patient. Stubborn and hard-hearted. If there is a will, there is a way. Determined. Never give up. Hardly becomes angry unless provoked. Loves to be alone. Thinks differently from others. Sharp-minded. Motivates oneself. Does not appreciate praises. High-spirited. Well-built and tough. Deep love and emotions. Romantic. Uncertain in relationships. Homely. Hardworking. High abilities. Trustworthy. Honest and keeps secrets. Not able to control emotions. Unpredictable.
Brilliant may be stretching it a bit, but I am very smart!
Bold the 5-10 that best apply to you.-
Copy to your own journal, with all twelve months.-
Tag 12 people from your friends list.
Click here to get the list of all twelve months.
NOVEMBER: Has a lot of ideas. Difficult to fathom. Thinks forward. Unique and brilliant. Extraordinary ideas. Sharp thinking. Fine and strong clairvoyance. Can become good doctors. Dynamic in personality. Secretive. Inquisitive. Knows how to dig secrets. Always thinking. Less talkative but amiable. Brave and generous. Patient. Stubborn and hard-hearted. If there is a will, there is a way. Determined. Never give up. Hardly becomes angry unless provoked. Loves to be alone. Thinks differently from others. Sharp-minded. Motivates oneself. Does not appreciate praises. High-spirited. Well-built and tough. Deep love and emotions. Romantic. Uncertain in relationships. Homely. Hardworking. High abilities. Trustworthy. Honest and keeps secrets. Not able to control emotions. Unpredictable.
Brilliant may be stretching it a bit, but I am very smart!
Sunday, April 13, 2008
Iran...What the %$#@?
So here is my daily rant - I hopped online yesterday to read my email and the news on CNN, like always. Usually the news just makes me plain old sad - to see all the crap that's going on in the world...But today it pissed me off - completely pissed me off! I was reading this article about how some Iranian ships had a confrontation with the US Navy in the Gulf. Iran denies any such thing, but apparently three Iranian vessels approached a Navy ship, one of which got close enough they had to fire a warning shot. The US Navy says it was no big deal, but, like I said, Iran says it didn't happen. In fact, here is the quote that appeared in the IRNA (the official Iranian news agency).
IRNA said the U.S. media "tries to portray the Persian Gulf as a turbulent area in order to prepare the grounds for the permanent presence of U.S. forces in the region."
Excuse me?! I believe they are the country currently continuing their nuclear energy program (purely for energy reasons, of course - note the sarcasm...) which the UN has repeatedly told them to stop. They have given us every reason (and don't get me started on their role in the War on Terrorism in the Middle East), by refusing to heed to UN's warnings, to feel our presence in the Gulf in entirely necessary. Honestly, do you want Iran to have Nuclear weapons?
Do they just think that things are going so damn well in Iraq and Afghanistan that we're looking to go to war with them too? Like we've got nothing better to do as a country with our resources to to maintain peace and fight for freedom throughout the entire world!
Honestly, there are some days when I feel we are on the brink of World War III with the Middle East! I just don't understand how religious differences have gotten so entirely out of hand. Does anyone honestly believe (except for the extremist Muslims like Al-Qaeda) that this is actually what God wants?
IRNA said the U.S. media "tries to portray the Persian Gulf as a turbulent area in order to prepare the grounds for the permanent presence of U.S. forces in the region."
Excuse me?! I believe they are the country currently continuing their nuclear energy program (purely for energy reasons, of course - note the sarcasm...) which the UN has repeatedly told them to stop. They have given us every reason (and don't get me started on their role in the War on Terrorism in the Middle East), by refusing to heed to UN's warnings, to feel our presence in the Gulf in entirely necessary. Honestly, do you want Iran to have Nuclear weapons?
Do they just think that things are going so damn well in Iraq and Afghanistan that we're looking to go to war with them too? Like we've got nothing better to do as a country with our resources to to maintain peace and fight for freedom throughout the entire world!
Honestly, there are some days when I feel we are on the brink of World War III with the Middle East! I just don't understand how religious differences have gotten so entirely out of hand. Does anyone honestly believe (except for the extremist Muslims like Al-Qaeda) that this is actually what God wants?
You Left Me
After the divorce
I left you
or you left me,
pushed me away
I thought time
would lessen my grief
help me to forgive you
forget you
but we are bound by
a much higher purpose
ordained by God
chosen purposely
nurtured
I sought answers
again and again
your approval
again and again
but you left me
alone with my
shattered illusions
and my cynicism
slowly I withered
like an apple
fallen to the ground
firm flesh
muddled and distorted
misshapen
till it was
unrecognizable
rotten and bitter
you left me
with my hurt
and my hatred
you left me
I left you
or you left me,
pushed me away
I thought time
would lessen my grief
help me to forgive you
forget you
but we are bound by
a much higher purpose
ordained by God
chosen purposely
nurtured
I sought answers
again and again
your approval
again and again
but you left me
alone with my
shattered illusions
and my cynicism
slowly I withered
like an apple
fallen to the ground
firm flesh
muddled and distorted
misshapen
till it was
unrecognizable
rotten and bitter
you left me
with my hurt
and my hatred
you left me
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